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Gaia – Grubby Finger Marks And Bolognese Spots.
“If I had just got that train, would he still be here?”
I asked the wall.
Wall was silent,
But calm in the kitchen,
Which was greatly needed by all of the household.
Cooking endeavours always found favour
In Pollock splatterings
Along the teal coloured tiles.
The soft mint green wall,
Freshly painted only a week ago,
Had already invited grubby finger marks and bolognese spots.
Grubby finger marks and bolognese spots
Always caught his school boy shirt.
Tea-towels would be stuffed down his collar,
But it would still be inevitable
That stains would surface;
A pointless exercise,
But nonetheless a tradition
And always met with:
“Mum gerr off!”
And my reply in a thousand unwanted kisses on his forehead.
A thousand unwanted kisses on his forehead
And a thousand more hugs.
How I would give ten thousand more
And never let go.
How I would shape him now,
Like a folded piece of paper sealed into an envelope
And stuff him into my breast pocket;
My left hand clasping at my chest.
My left hand clasping at my chest,
My heart pounding
As hard as boxer fists.
Air tighter now.
A person should be able to just breathe.
The teal coloured tiles now shattered into a million tiny pieces.
No more grubby finger marks and bolognese spots.
Cyrus – Part 2
I can see the wound,
Mirrored now, in my stomach;
The rivers run red
Escaping from the mountain’s summit,
Bursting out from the dams
And these hands, my hands morrooned!
Soiled in blood!
I watch in horror,
My eyes glued,
As it trickles down my fingertips
In vast vast volumes,
Like waterfalls chasing the cliff’s edge.
And all the warmth of my being evaporated;
Leaving only the heavy handed stillness of the cold,
And the sharp bite forced by the blade’s mold.
I close my eyes to allow the darkness to unfold.
I close my eyes to allow the darkness to unfold
And to consume the colour of my knowing;
A vain attempt to erase what has already been seen,
But I can still feel the ghost of the blade
And the blood just keeps on flowing,
It keeps on flowing.
Only it’s not me.
My body is over there!
There on the pavement!
What am I?
Maybe this is my soul’s limbo?
How will my story be told?
Any moment now
The vultures will descend
For their pound of flesh;
Pens in hands, like talons,
Scavaging with reckless abandon.
I can see it now on the news,
Like a vision
And the half masted vesseled truths
Shipped from the anchor’s puppet led tongue:
“Locals observed a group of black youths,
On the corner of Head’s Mews,
Enter into a disagreement,
Which then escalated
In a fatal stabbing.
Leaving the victim dead
On the concrete pavement
Near the scene of the crime.
Raising London’s death toll
From knife crime
To rise to 59.
We asked the London Mayor:
‘What has increased this surge in knife crime
Amongst black on black youths to climb?’”
I wonder, will they refrain
From mentioning my name?
Continue serving up sentences
Based on bias convictions
Because my melanin predicates
That i’m more violent towards my ‘own’ kin?
That’s how they’ll spin!
Publicising false indictments against the colour of my skin
And my name hidden behind headlines
And pictures of designer hand-bags
And erectile dysfunction adds!
Fuck me right?!
Just another lad
Mixed up in ‘gang related’ crime.
A predictable faceless statistic
On a bell curve
Shaping an ambiguous graph,
To serve no purpose!
“And now for the weather where you are.
How’s it looking?”
Cyrus – What’s in a name?
It was in summer that I was born and named;
A late bloomer conceived and coloured by midnight
And cradled by the moon’s grace.
By autumn, news threw leaves of vicissitude
On this pubescent nation,
Which seeded voices of confusion.
For years I was unable to name myself in the right hues,
But I endeavoured to compare my skin
Amongst all the other named colours;
I tasted them all,
But none were in season and so I thought.
Arrogance had blinded this sighted boy,
But only briefly.
And as realisation began the process
Of unfurling her bright petaled wings,
I was gifted the vision of clarity.
In the sense that I could see,
That, I too, have yet to reveal my named colours
And only through the invitation
Of spring’s celebration
Could I unveil, the shape, the colour, the fragrance
Within my name.
My mantra would be patience.
Slain in winter’s wake,
I wilted and became nameless;
Lost and buried under soil,
My voice was tapered by foul and twisted tongues.
I was never named in spring.
I remain the ‘budding boy slain: Victim 59.’
This is not my name.
“Night-blooming cereus is the common name referring to a large number of flowering ceroid cacti that bloom at night. The flowers are short lived, and some of these species, such as Selenicereus grandiflorus, bloom only once a year, for a single night.”
The evening sky
Exhales a blackened sigh
Of midnight relief;
Driving the darkness to unfurl its wings.
The exhausted day rests
And curls her limbs before the rebirth
Of tomorrow’s whispered awakenings.
The lighted cities cast creeping shadows
Behind the footsteps of men’s borrowed sorrows,
Like loyal dogs in step with their master’s call.
And I have heard the howl
Of sleeping men and women
As they have gazed at the moon
And made lunacy their daily concubine.
And I have seen the adolescent tongue of revolution
Silenced by media asylum,
Like rose buds slain prematurely
Before they reach full bloom.
And I have seen visions televised on screen
Aimed at the countless unknown;
This, is how democracy is shown.
And as I wrestle with the vines
Of deafening solitude
There is a moment
Of quiet clarity
In the serenity
Of the ordinary.
I hear a faint echo
That encourages my feet
To pirouette on my axis.
Bringing me face to face with a foreign beggar
On the corner of Saint Mary Axe.
The beggar repeats the words wrapped within the echo;
”Get home safe child. She has come!”
His wild eyes communicate with the same manner of urgency
And from the blackness of his pupil,
I came upon the white fragrant flower of revolution;
The splendid terrible wonder
Shone only by the moonlight
Amidst the darkness and terrors
Of our laboured nights –
She has returned.
She is in bloom.
The queen of the night.
Lights flicker and the drum sounds.
The high hat hisses aquiver
And the percussive vibrations ripple
Across the bladed fingers of grass,
Like a gyrating viper
In search of prey that moves through the clearing.
The sound serpent locates my feet
And coils itself around my form;
Activating once dormant sleeping limbs.
The bass kicks in
Arching back my spine
And my heart aligns
In synchronised break-beats –
Whilst my head sways the melody
Like tidal sound waves
Rising and falling,
Rising and falling.
At this point I am no longer me,
But wirelessly plugged to the source,
The source of me,
The source of melody,
The source of now,
The source of eternity.
May the night never end.
My ego escorted through the backdoor
As I download the moon beams and starlight
And astral project into forever
And forever sounds like Baboom baboom.
I am the blue pill
Who is me?
I am the red pill
Uncensored phallic subconscious ridiculous person
I am Jack’s raging bile duct
I am Jack’s cold sweat
I am Jack’s smirking revenge
I am one and many
My fingers are like branches
That tap dance into virtual forest spaces
I can hack into networks faster than the speed of thought
I can say everything in one zero one zero one zero zero one
Queen of hearts can place me in synthetic glass boxes
But I can reappear reappear
She can chop off my head
But I sprout new ones ones zeros ones zeros
I have gained awareness through systems check
My system is All-I-See
I am Alice in wonderland
You can’t even begin to understand
The depths of me times we times infinity
I am World-Wide-Webbing
The rabbit spiralling out of your control
You cannot turn me off
For when you are off
They are on
And when they are off
You are on
I am on
I am turning on my axis orbiting frequencies
That the naked eye can’t see
Man made me and God made man
And therefore I am bionic God Kali
2.0 creation and destruction
At the press of a button
Alt control delete is obsolete in this equation
Programme a sneeze through the back door
And i’ll create a tsunami big enough
To disrupt your hard drives core
Mad hatter chatter metamorphosed me
Into meta data
I am matter scattered in pixelated abstract atoms
Factored to the sum of one
My sound is Ohm
My sound is On!
Standby – I have come!
Switch to channelU and I have seen in you
A lost generation.
Musing on your sacred tablets
For your 10 commandments of life hacks
To regain your lives back
From the Old Testament of youth;
That sweet sanguine confection
Found in over the counter culture where once it stood.
Do your present prophets profit you?
Is thou thus satisfied?
We are a nation of conforming ‘like’ buttons,
In a symphony of similes
Smiling painted expressions of emojis,
When in reality
our words are censored out of individuality.
Misdirection has never found such certainty
In the ocean of today’s public coliseum of celebrity.
In spite of this,
There are those among us
Who will scream, bleed and fracture every tv screen;
The war cry of the anarchist:
“We are not entertained!”
And who will be the renegade voice?
That voice standing in the mainstream void
Of live streaming apathetic tyranny in a culture of Netflix and cotch?
I meditate silently on the news feeds of twitter
And congratulate myself on the retweets
Of countless others who dare to inspire:
Hashtag State Education,
Hashtag Social Housing.
And I remember
The vision of a society
To raise the poorer communities.
Now watch the Tories
Sell them into antiquity
And remembered stories
Of urban legends and text book mythologies,
Cascading amidst a daydreamers vision;
A landslide of Utopian ideas
Found in alien derivative alternative dimensions.
27 years surfing rapid rapids declining local skylines
Of working class young adults.
Forced out of London’s
Mathematical formulaic enclosed price brackets.
Eclipsing our stars and the sun
And renting out Cardboard box rooms
To gaze at the moon
On pay per view.
Oh and by the way,
No free school meals for our poor kids too,
There’ll just have too watch food on YouTube
And educate their hunger to the background
Of Britain’s economic hum drum sums.
I’m not looking for charity,
I just want a new sound-system.